Do you want this COVID-19 situation to be over with? I know I do. It’s easy to find ourselves lost in thought dreaming of a coronavirus-less future. One where the virus hasn’t twirled our lives round and round like clothes in a drier.
“The only thing that is truly significant about today, or any other day, is who you become in the process.” – Joshua Medcalf
Wishing for a different future during challenging times, desiring to be in a better situation than your current one, is normal. Wishing that this craziness will be over tomorrow, that things will be normal tomorrow, that life will begin anew tomorrow, is normal—but it’s not realistic; unfortunately, this will last a bit longer.
We can’t know with absolute certainty when all of this will be over. It’s a volatile, changing, evolving situation. One that we have little control over.
So, it’s here that we come to a fork in the road: we can ruminate on all the things outside of our control—focusing on things outside of us—or, we can focus on what we can control. We can control our thoughts and actions.
Most importantly, by focusing on what we can control, we can control who we become during these tough times.
To illustrate this, I want to share a story with you.
Kota’s House
In Joshua Medcalf’s book, Chop Wood Carry Water, he tells the story of a man named Kota, who built some of the finest houses in Tokyo. He had been building homes for over thirty years. His work was world famous because of his dedication to the process, and his relentless devotion to learning, even late into his career.
Kota had grown tired of building homes for other people though, and he was ready to retire. He wanted to travel and spend lots of time with his grandkids.
One day, Kota approached his boss, and turned in his two-week notice. His boss said, “Kota, we are forever indebted to you for the magnificent work you have done for our company, and we are so grateful you have worked for us so long. We do have one favor to ask of you though. Could you please build one more house? It is a very important house, for a very important client, and everyone in the company agreed it needs your special touch!”
Kota was frustrated. He told his boss he needed a day to think about it. And, after talking with his wife, he gave in and decided he would build one more house.
But while Kota had agreed with his head to build this last house, his heart was no longer in it. This house was different. He viewed it more as an obligation than an opportunity.
Kota had grown bitter while working on this house because, understandably, this was the one house he didn’t want to build. He could tell it wasn’t the same quality people expected from him, but he didn’t care. He was ready to move onto the next phase in his life.
The next phase was more appealing and important to him than the current phase was.
Months passed and the house was completed. So, Kota went back to his boss and said, “I did what you asked, the last house is done.” “That’s great Kota!” his boss said, ”Now one last thing.”
Feeling more than a little frustrated, Kota said, “What is it?”
“Here,” his boss said, handing him a key, “The house you just built, it’s yours. It’s our gift to you for all you’ve done for this company.“
Kota was stunned. His heart sank. This whole time he was building his own house.
His only focus had been on finishing the house, checking the box, being done with it. That’s the thing about focus: when we focus on something, we are inherently not focusing on something else. He had both eyes focused on the outcome, to the house being done, so he had no eyes left to focus on the process. Because of this, the outcome suffered.
Whether you realize it or not, with every action you take, you are building your own house. Your thoughts, behaviors, and habits, overtime, create who you become.
Every choice is a chance to build your own house.
Will you let COVID-19 control your life, to shape who you are?
Or, will you control what’s in your power to control and grow from this hardship?
Who Will You Be After the COVID-19 Pandemic is Over??
“It can ruin your life only if it ruins your character.” – Marcus Aurelius
Everyone is affected by COVID-19. Every. Single. Person. Some in large ways, other in smaller ways, but, regardless, this hit us all.
Ask yourself this: “Who do I want to be during the COVID-19 situation and after?”
When life gets hard, as it has for all of us, how will you respond to the challenge?
The COVID-19 situation can be used as fertilizer to grow your inner garden—your character—or, it can become weeds that ruin it. The choice is yours.
You can cultivate new, good habits, or bad ones. You can become the type of person who consistently gets 7-9 hours of sleep. That consistently exercises. That consistently reads every day.
Or, you could let bad habits take root.
You could choose to waste hour upon hour upon hour on social media.
You could spend this time watching Netflix for hours until the inevitable note pops up: “Are you still watching?”
You could stop moving and exercising.
So, who will you become during this time of pain and struggle?
The answer to that question is within your control.
Because this will pass. We’ll get through this, we have to. And who we are at the end of this craziness will be determined by what we do today—right now.
You’re always building your own house. Will you build a great one?
In order to help you out with this, to help you build a great house, I want you to consider this mindset shift: change your “what ifs,” to “even ifs.”
What Ifs And Even Ifs
During this time of uncertainty, it can be easy to get paralyzed with fear. We let our thoughts drift to all the possibilities of the future, and they look grim. “What if I lose my job?” you think. “What if I can’t pay rent?” “What if I can’t find toilet paper?”
These are real concerns; they are understandable. But they aren’t helpful if we ruminate and ruminate and freaking ruminate all day on them.
Instead of weighing ourselves down with all the “what ifs,” we can re-frame them as “even ifs.”
What if I lose my job… ⇒ Even if I lose my job…
What if I can’t go to the gym… ⇒ Even if I can’t go to the gym…
What if I fail… ⇒ Even if I fail…
Framing something as “even if” gives us a productive lens. Even if I lose my job…I have some savings in my bank while I start updating my resume. Even if I can’t make it to the gym…I can do the home workout I got from BSP and join a ZOOM training session. Even if I fail…I learned how to succeed next time.
Remember: you’re always building your own house. How you act today shapes who you become tomorrow. Who will you become during the COVID-19 situation? After it? Will you have made use of this time to grow and learn, or, did you let it slip away? Will you sit there, ruminating on all the “what ifs” your mind conjures—or will you view them as “even ifs,” and do what needs to be done?
Marcus Aurelius said,
“Anywhere you can lead your life, you can lead a good one.”
We’re all capable of leading a good life, because when we choose to control our thoughts, actions, and choices, we become the person capable of building a beautiful house.
Sources:
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Chop Wood Carry Water By Joshua Medcalf
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Pound The Stone By Joshua Medcalf