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(703) 444-0662 Hours 21620 RIDGETOP CIRCLE STE 150, STERLING, VA 20166
(703) 444-0662 Hours 21620 RIDGETOP CIRCLE STE 150, STERLING, VA 20166
03
Mar

Start Now: Why Waiting for The Perfect Time is the Worst Thing to do

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The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.

-Jordan Belfort

(Yes, I realize that I just quoted a con artist. But the sentiment rings true. Let’s carry on.)

 

I want you to reminisce on a time when everything was perfect. Here are a few parameters to help:

 

  • Nothing disrupted your schedule. In fact, you didn’t even worry about scheduling.
  • Work was like play and there was no stress from deadlines or coworkers.
  • Life outside of work was without struggle.
  • There was never a temptation goading you to stray from positive action toward your goals.

 

Could you remember that perfect time when all the stars aligned, and everything was easy? Most likely not, right? And if you did, it was probably nostalgia about childhood when your ignorance about the nature of the world saved you from worry. But you’re probably misremembering even that. You forget the pain and confusion of being a tiny person without autonomy.

 

Maybe you’ve seen through my little illustration to the point that I’m making. There is no perfect time. There never has been. There never will be. Perfect is a bullshit story that you’re telling yourself to guard your ego from the truth that you’re procrastinating.

 

Maybe you don’t actually want the things that you say you want. Maybe they’re just nice ideas.

 

Or maybe you’re not ready to sacrifice for success. There are thousands of other possible reasons. But the truth is that waiting for the perfect time, or for things to slow down a bit, is just a lie you’re telling yourself. It might be a lie to pad your ego. It might be a lie to shield you from the fear and discomfort of doing what’s necessary to make progress. No matter how you slice it, it’s a lie.

 

There is no perfect time. There never has been. There never will be.

 

The problem is that you’re counting on external conditions. You need them to be right so that you can begin. But the external world will always do what it wants, and you will always be subject to its whims. If you wait for the “right” external conditions, you’ll never begin. There will always be something for you to point to and say, “Nope, that’s in the way right now. I’m going to wait until it passes.” And by the time it passes, something else will come up. You’ll be stuck in the same cycle of waiting, never acting to make the improvements you’d like to make.

 

Instead, what you need is to build the skills that allow you to have an internal locus of control despite the chaos of your external conditions. And you build those skills by acting no matter the external conditions. Not by waiting for some illusory perfection.

 

And as you consider building that internal structure, it’s helpful to ask yourself one question:

 

Am I willing to do this right now?

 

That’s the real question, isn’t it? Not whether or not the external conditions are right. It’s whether or not you’re internally ready. Answer honestly.

 

Now, if the answer is no and you circle back to external circumstances as the reason, you know it’s time to give that shit up. Circumstances will always be imperfect.

 

If the answer is no and it’s because you know you’re just not willing to sacrifice right now, that’s okay. It’s at least a start, because it’s honest. But then, ask yourself when you will be ready to sacrifice and what will make you ready? Do you need to feel more pain? What will do it for you? Seriously, what will make you ready?

 

I think, many times, folks are waiting for perfect circumstances because they believe whatever change they are trying to make is huge. It seems daunting, so they must gather all possible resources, internal and external, to be ready. If that’s how you’re feeling, stop and ask yourself, is that actually true? Do I actually have to do something huge to get started, or do I just need to start wherever I am and with whatever I have…and then be happy with even miniscule, forward progress.

 

The truth is, you can circumvent all of this with honesty, desire, and curiosity.

 

Honesty about what it is you want and why you want it.

 

Desire for the thing that you want that’s backed by purpose.

 

Curiosity about yourself and what you might do to move yourself forward. And what you might learn in the process.

“But,” you ask, “aren’t there times when I’m more likely to be successful than others? Aren’t there times when I’d be better off and set myself up for success?”

Yes, that’s certainly true. And those times are when you’re willing to be honest with yourself, you’re willing to work with reality and your circumstances, and when you’re done making excuses. Those are the times when you’re more likely to be successful.

 

Now, I know that’s not exactly what you meant, or the answer that you were looking for. So, how about a real-life example from the Beyond Strength nutrition coaching program?

 

We launched our nutrition coaching program just as the 2022 holiday season began. Right as we all walked into the onslaught of cookies, cakes, and pies. Just as each meal promised to leave satiety in the dust while it busted our guts. Many folks expressed interest in the program, but they also expressed fear about committing to 12 weeks of building nutrition habits during the holiday season. Wouldn’t this be the worst time to start a nutrition coaching program? Only if you aren’t willing to be honest with yourself, you’re not willing to work with reality and your circumstances, and you want to make excuses.

 

Most everyone that engaged with the program for 12 weeks lost 10 pounds. And that’s during the time that, if we followed the logic of waiting for perfect conditions, they should have failed miserably and gained weight. But they didn’t. Why? Because they didn’t lie to themselves. They took imperfect action, but they nonetheless took action. And they wanted to move themselves forward.

 

Yes, they had a world class program as a resource, and they had the coaching and guidance of Chris “Daniel Daniel” Merritt. But so would have all of the other folks that decided that they needed to wait until things settled down a bit after the holidays.

 

Things will never settle down.

 

There is no perfect time. There never has been. There never will be.

 

There is, however, purpose, desire, and self-honesty. On top of that is imperfect action and skill building that develops an internal locus of control.

 

Take immediate, imperfect action in imperfect circumstances. Then take the next imperfect action. Then the next one. You’ll amazed at the clarity you gain and the progress you make.

 

I’ll leave you with a quote from someone that, by most people, is held in higher esteem than Jordan Belfort.

“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.”

-Mother Teresa

Begin.

 

 

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