Has life ever metaphorically kicked you in the face? A time where, everything was going fine, and bam! life got harder.
Personally, one moment in particular comes to mind, and it happened in my middle school years.
Growing up, I was a pretty normal kid…or so I like to think. I loved Spider-Man and other superheroes. I sunburned easily. And I played little league baseball.
Life as a kid was easy. I went fishing with my family, played video games, and things my parents wanted—well, most of the time. And I even got to eat lots of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
(crust included, to be clear. I wasn’t a crust-less sandwich eater like my brother…)
Unfortunately, life wasn’t always superheroes and sandwiches.
The summer of 2007—the summer before I started eighth grade—didn’t go as planned. It was where I learned that life could be rough.
One morning that summer, I woke up, and I did what I always did: I went outside to jump on my trampoline. It was the best. I had saved up for years and bought it with my own money. I have so many good memories from it.
And some not so good ones too.
On that day, I came down from one of my jumps with my legs underneath me. My hip landed on my right heel, which spun my ankle counterclockwise—and my leg snapped in half.
Both my tibia and fibula—the shin bone and bone behind it respectively—broke in that moment.
Even now, thirteen years later, I can still hear the bones break. It was as distinct as the “pop” of a cork from a champagne bottle; however, it was far from an event worth celebrating.
You’re Still Here
When my leg broke that day, my idea of what my life was shattered too. In an instant—one that I never in a million years saw coming—life was different. I couldn’t walk without assistance. I couldn’t go to the bathroom without assistance. I felt useless.
But you know what’s crazy? I wouldn’t change or prevent my leg from being broken even if I could. I’m grateful it happened.
Because as painful as that whole experience was, it showed me how strong I could be. Going through that experience—being in a cast for four and half months, learning to walk again—taught me I could handle whatever life sent my way. That I would be okay.
When life kicks me in the face now, as it still does, I reflect on that experience—on the strength I gained from it. And I know I can keep going.
And I believe each of us is capable of getting through whatever is thrown our way, as well.
Maybe the challenging time for you wasn’t a broken bone. Maybe you lost a loved one. Maybe you lost a job. Maybe you went through a rough break up.
And maybe you are still dealing with some of these things. But you know what? You’re still here. You’ve made it through every challenge life has thrown your way.
That’s why I’m confident we’ll make it through the collective challenge we now face.
We’ll Be Okay
No one in the world woke up one day and said, “Man, you know what would be great? A pandemic. Wish one of those would come soon.”
Likewise, I didn’t wake up one morning and say, “Gee, you know what would go well with some trampoline jumping? A broken leg. That would be awesome.”
We didn’t ask for this pandemic. But it’s here. It’s reality. We can’t escape that fact.
So as we navigate this situation together I want to ask you a question.
What challenging time have you faced in your life that you didn’t make it through?
That question may have caused you to pause for a second. Because, well, it can’t be answered. The fact you’re reading this means you’ve made it through all the challenging times life has thrown your way.
If life knocked you over, you got back up. If a log was thrown in your path, you climbed over it.
COVID-19 has presented us with unique challenges that most—if not all of us—were unprepared for. It rocked our world back and forth like a boat in a storm.
But, just like we’ve weathered the storms in our life and prevailed—I mean, we’ve got a pretty good track record of making it through each day—we will get through this.
Will things be different? Sure.
Will things be hard? No doubt.
Will we make it through? Absolutely. We’ll figure things out. Then, we’ll figure them out again as things change.
And while reflecting on our past struggles that we overcame can be helpful, it can also help to look at the lives of others. Seeing what others have gone through, and grown through—what they’ve overcome—can give us strength and hope.
A great example that comes to mind, when I think of perseverance, is the story of James Stockdale as a prisoner of war.
Prisoner of War
On September 9th, 1965, Navy Vice Admiral James Stockdale was flying a Douglas A-4 Skyhawk over Northern Vietnam. While flying back from a mission, his plane was attacked by the Vietnamese and he was forced to eject from his cockpit.
As he floated down on his parachute into enemy territory, he saw the Vietnamese rushing towards him. Later in life, he remembered thinking in that moment, “Five years down there at least.”
Unfortunately, Stockdale was wrong about five years. He spent not five, but seven years at the Vietnamese prison in Hanoi.
Seven painful years of torture. Stockdale was forced to stay in what, he would later describe, as a concrete box. His legs were shackled to the floor. The cell was windowless. It was horrible, to put it lightly.
But James Stockdale maintained hope while in hell. After he was released, he was quoted saying the following:
“You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.”
You may want to reread that again to let it sink in.
Stockdale went through an unimaginably hard situation, and he had no way of knowing, with certainty, that it would end. But he found a way to stay alive by both hoping for the best while also acknowledging the worst.
“Who didn’t make it out?”
“Oh, that’s easy,” he said. “The optimists.”
“The optimists? I don’t understand,” I said, now completely confused, given what he’d said a hundred meters earlier.
“The optimists. Oh, they were the ones who said, ‘We’re going to be out by Christmas.’ And Christmas would come, and Christmas would go. Then they’d say,’We’re going to be out by Easter.’ And Easter would come, and Easter would go. And then Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again. And they died of a broken heart.”– From a discussion with Jim Collins for his book, Good to Great
No matter how bad we wish this pandemic to be over, that life will be back to normal, it isn’t at this moment. But, like Stockdale was able to survive imprisonment for seven years—in a windowless cell being tortured—we can make it through this.
We don’t want this current reality. He didn’t want his.
We can find inner strength like he did and make it through this.
We’ll Make It Through This Too
When my leg broke on that trampoline, life changed—no longer could I do all the things I wanted to.
When James Stockdale’s plane was shot down and he was captured, he lost far more than I did. But he maintained hope. He persevered for seven years.
Think about it this way: we’ve got a 100% success rate for making it through each day.
We can and will get back to our lives. Sure, it will take time, there will be challenges, but when has something in life, something that truly matters, ever come without a little work? We’ll get back on our feet again, just like I had to learn to get back on mine.
We’ll figure things out. We have to get to.